How only child prejudice affects the family

I received this email from ‘Jo’ which I think contrasts very well both the prejudice parents of only children face as well as that of only-children themselves. Jo also describes how the idea of a sibling is so dear to her as well. I am so thankful to find your site! I have often times thought of starting something of my own in order to connect with other “onlies.” I have always hated being the only child. Both of my parents come from large families, and I had many cousins. All of them except one had siblings. Even though I knew I was loved by them, I always felt different, an outsider. Another problem I encountered was the prejudice against only children: As a child I was very sensitive to what others would say. I wanted to fit in. In Kindergarten I made up a story that I had several [...]

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What it feels like… to have just one child

An only child, Erica Wagner, reveals her reservations and delight at having just one son The Sunday Times, 27 June 2010 “How many children do you have?” is an everyday question I’ve come to dread. “One,” I reply, humbly. “Only one?” Eyebrows shoot skyward. Uncomfortable surprise turns to downright horror when it is established that my only child is nine, and therefore I’m unlikely to be planning another baby. “Oh, a lonely only,” one mother commented, with a devastated sigh. Having only one child works for me, but my decision is obviously hard for some to understand; I seem to defy logic. My husband and I both work from home, we have flexible careers that would accommodate a baker’s dozen, and we both adore our nine-year-old son, Conrad. Yet one is enough for us. Mothers of more sometimes appear to disapprove of my choice. Besides the “lonely only” comment, complete [...]

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