What are the issues for adult onlies?

by on May 30, 2011

in Emails

I’m a 31 year old only child (female).  I had lots of friends and I can’t remember ever feeling lonely, like other people on your site. I always found it easy to make friends when I was at school and growing up. I still have a good group of very close (mainly female) friends and we are a bit of a urban family in London. However, now I’m single in my 30s after one long relationship in my 20s and I am of the mind set that I’m better off on my own – I don’t know if this is because of being an only child?

I feel like what’s the point of trusting a man to make you happy, I’m better off on my own.  I can spend time (and often need to be) on my own quite happily, unlike most of my friends who seem to crave constant company.  I also try not to rely on anyone, too much (in case they let me down)  and am extremely independent.

I do worry about when my parents get old – at the rate it’s going I’m going to have to single-handlely look after my mum, her boyfriend and my dad (I don’t have a particularly good relationship with last two on the list).

Recently at a work lunch some colleagues were talking about only children saying that their ‘only’ friends tend to tell them inane details about their lives – why would they be interested? They also mentioned that ’onlys’ never queue. I can’t remember what else they said but they were mainly negative comments.

Whilst I’d never thought of myself in the classic ‘spoilt’ only child role I could relate to some of the things they were saying.  I had never thought about this and I do think that only children do miss out on social interaction, rules and how to deal with not being centre of attention.  I’m quite sensitive and don’t take criticism very well?

I guess I would like to know if some of my ‘issues’ are a result of being an only child?

However, I would say in the main I am very happy with being an only child and I suppose people with siblings have just as many things they can blame on their brothers and sisters!

 

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What are the significant concerns for adult onlies?

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