What I need as an only

by on October 23, 2004

in Workshop experiences

Poem from the workshop: – October 23rd 2004

Daddy I needed you to help me grow up
become more balanced,
less worried,
less temperamental,
less emotionally needy
I know you are pleased
with what I am
more than my mother
but you still expect me
to watch over you

Mummy, I needed you
to be less possessive
less doting
you wanted me to be
your shadow
your re-incarnation
your chance to have another life
to compensate for your failed one

Now I am so messed up
I don’t know how to move on
I want to have what most people have emotionally
let me go
let me be free
I will still love you much,
too much

If only I had not been
a good girl
If only I had not been
so obedient
Some day I’ll understand
why it has been so difficult
to keep afloat

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